Spastic Stories From The Coffee Shop

So, I live a little over a mile from one of my favorite coffee shops, The Whistle Stop. Since my Starbucks gift card is officially empty, I decided to walk there instead. It's a pretty nice day, but the bulk of my walk was in direct sun. So, even though I wasn't hot on my walk, I wound up sweating, well, a lot. So by the time I get there, (well, here, I'm writing this while sitting at the Whistle Stop and listening to Mat Kearney on Spotify), I'm lightly misted, makeup half gone, and a bit stinky.

Since I'm a frequent customer, I know the girls who work here and we have a nice, friendly rapport. (Plus they're just generally really nice, friendly, lovely people.) Anyway, before I ordered, they told me about how their morning was kind of rough. One girl got a mug dropped on her, the other had a coke explode over her. There were other things, too, but they were all like that.

I walked, and I was planning on hanging out and working for a bit, but my trip would overlap lunch. So, I ordered a protein shake. The Whistle Stop has awesome protein shakes. And it was a good choice for my situation: protein to make up for the delayed lunch, cold to combat the heat and exhaustion I built up from walking.

So, I get my drink, walk to my table, and set the drink on the table. Only I didn't. See, I meant to. But I entirely missed the table. Like no part of the cup ever touched the table. It just rocketed straight to the ground, crashing and busting open, spewing chocolate protein shake halfway across the coffee shop. "Shoot," I muttered, thinking about how I just added on to the lovely baristas' long list of muckups from the morning. I reached down, picked up the cup, to stand it upright, and just... dropped it again. Frantically, I grabbed a stack of napkins and timidly admitted that I spilled the drink all over the place. 

Back at my table, I tried to clean the floor up a bit. One of the baristas came over to help me, bringing with her a mop and towel. Together, we cleaned up the floor. I apologized about 16,000 times and she laughed and tried to make me feel better. Then she mixed me another drink and I tipped her all my ones (which was a lot of ones... how do I have so many ones? what am I a stripper?) and thanked her and apologized.

Long story short: I'm a complete spazz and you should go to the Whistle Stop. They have really good drinks, really nice baristas, and at least one really clumsy customer.

My List

So, if you follow my twitter you may already know that recently, I read, my friend/former youth minster, Ethan Bryan's new book Catch and Release: Faith, Freedom, and Knuckleballs. (If you want, you can read my shelfari review of it here.)

A lot of things stuck with me from the book. For instance, and this is where this blogpost is coming from, Ethan brings up a philosophy practiced by his friend, Ryan Eller. Ryan, according to Ethan, is "a professional dreamer," and as such, he always encourages people to "Live Your List." The idea is that you write a list of everything that you want to do in your life (a bucket list, if you will) and then you just try to live that list. That way, you don't wind up sitting around wishing you had gone to that Little Mix concert or tried horse back riding or whatever.

I'm all about lists. I love making lists. Every year, on Christmas Eve, I make a list of things I want to do during the following year. If I didn't do that, I probably would have never gone to a dance club. Don't get me wrong, I did not enjoy going to that dance club. But, now at least I've been to one.

So, I'm going to do it. I'm going to write a list of stupid, ridiculous things I want to do during my lifetime, and I'm starting it here:

1. Go to Leakycon
2. Take improv classes
3. Make a perfect batch of chocolate chip cookies
4. Meet an online friend in the real world
5. Visit Renee in Australia
6. Go on a trip where I live out of a backpack (that's called backpacking, isn't it?)
7. Get a massage from a professional masseuse
8. Be part of a couple's costume on Halloween
9. Get paid to do Stand Up Comedy
10. Meet Mindy Kaling
11. Create something that goes viral
12. Use the line, "I'm a good cook, you eat food, so you should come over for dinner" on someone (I don't know, I just like it.)
13. Buy some stupid expensive makeup product
14. Have that moment when I walk in a room and everyone turns to look at me like /hot damn/
15. Make a dress
16. Meet Hayley G Hoover
17. Swim with dolphins
18. Profit off of something that I wrote
19. Go to Vidcon
20. Watch SNL preformed live from the actual living audience
21. Fix up a house
22. Learn to code in HTML
23. Learn to code in JAVA
24. Get hella good at cake decorating
25. Take a dance class
26. Do some sort of stupid/grotesque restaurant food challenge
27. Attend some sort of rally/political demonstration with a good and worthy cause
28. Volunteer at a suicide prevention hotline
29. Be a regular somewhere--where one of the workers goes, "Hey, Kat! Your usual?" And I go, "Yeah, thanks Alex!" or whatever their name is. 
30. Raise $1000+ for the Trevor Project
31. See a play on Broadway
32. Get one of these ridiculous knight hoodies
33. Spend a couple of days going to all of the places Rainbow Rowell mentions in her novels
34. Read all of my unread books
35. Write for a hit TV show
36. Make one of those 10000 desserts put together pinterest desserts
37. Learn how to do a french braid (idk why is it so hard?)
38. Apply liquid eyeliner like a BAMF
39. Have one of those stupid long make-out secessions with a dude
40. Watch When Harry Met Sally all the way through and in order
41. Get one of those MASSIVE dogs
42. Ride an elephant
43. Acquire filming lights (for videos)
44. Acquire a decent HD camera (for videos)
45. Acquire a sound system (for videos)
46. Acquire better editing software (for videos)
47. Hug Lee Pace
48. Learn to surf.
49. Go kayaking. Or canoeing. Is there a difference?
50. Find out if there's a difference between kayaking and canoeing
51. Listen to Welcome To Nightvale
52. Write a children's mystery series 
53. Watch all the Wes Anderson films 
54. Build a clubhouse 
55. Do karaoke
56. See Sarah Kay perform
57. Start rollerskating. Or rollerblading. Whichever. 
58. Write my name in cement
59. Go on a vacation with my best friend
60. Bunnies

I'm sure there's more to come. But that's what I've got for now!

Birthday

In twenty days, I'm going to be twenty-three. And I'm kind of... nervous... about it.

I'm not nervous about turning twenty-three or being twenty-three, I'm more nervous about my actual birthday... day.

I know that there are people who just kind of grow out of birthdays. As they get older, fewer birthdays feel important. Some people will want to do something--like go out to dinner with friends or family--but they don't really want to have a big party or make a huge to-do about it. Let me tell you upfront: I am not one of those people.

I love birthdays. Birthdays are basically my favorite things. Not just mine. I love basically anybody's birthday. Gift Giving and Quality Time are basically tied for my top love language. And a birthday is basically spending time with someone and also giving them presents. But then I especially like my own birthday because it's like I'm just surrounded by the love, man. Also? I love planning things. Activities, outfits, menus. Event planning is pretty much my favorite thing of all time. So I love my birthday.

Sometimes, I literally start vaguely planning them months in advance. Like, this year? Back in April I was thinking that I'd have a Nate The Great themed shindig. Which I know is a children's book. But it was also my favorite children's book when I was a child. Anyway. I wanted to dress up like Rosamond. I wanted to have a pancake bar--with pancakes and a variety of toppings to choose from--because Nate the Great is always eating pancakes. I wanted to have a place where people could paint, though they would be limited to yellow and red paint in honor of the mystery Nate solves in the first book. I wanted to set up a treasure hunt. Sounds fun right?

But I'm not doing that.

Why? Good question. And I'll get to that. But first let me tell you about my 7th-10th grades of schooling. I had a group of girls that I'd been friends with since elementary school. (I'm going to make up names here, but my guess is if they read this they'll know that I'm talking about them. It's no hard feelings, though. It's just an important part of my explanation.) My group of since-elementary-school friends almost never asked me to hang out. A lot of the time, they'd all hang out without me. And that hurt my feelings a lot. I mean, I'm sure that they didn't do it on purpose. And I believe that they genuinely liked me. My guess is that they just never really thought to.

To combat the problem of my social pariahship, and aggressive loneliness, I would frequently get permission to have a friend come over. Then, the worse part. I would call Lindsey who couldn't come over because she had plans with Rebecca. So I'd call Rachel who couldn't come over for one reason or another. Then I'd call Lydia who couldn't come over because she had plans with Jessica. And so on and so forth until, I'd be so sad and feel so rejected and unlovable that I just couldn't call any more people. Were you ever that person who looked around the classroom when the teacher said, "Partner up!" and saw that all of your friends had already partnered up with one another? Because I wasn't just like that in class. I was like that in social life, too. I remember one time I went to the mall with my group of friends and we were walking from one store to another and up in front of me, Lindsey and Jessica were laughing and talking, and back behind me, Lydia and Rachel were laughing and talking and I was just in the middle. Walking alone.

Side note: I did spend a lot of time hanging out with Alli and Laura (those are their real names, sorry to them if they wanted to keep their identities secret) who are absolutely always the exception when I talk about friend groups that made me feel unwanted and annoying. I feel like, when I talk about my social experiences in high school, it's important to mention them as a disclaimer. Because they honestly salvaged my sanity and I love them both so much. Okay, that's enough of that. On to my story.

What does this have to do with you not having your awesome already planned out birthday party? Excellent question. The answer is basically that I've already called Lindsey and Rebecca, Rachel, Lydia, and Jessica, and none of them want to hang out.

Whaaaaat?

Okay, so, last year I had a really rough birthday. Sometime in late June/early July my father was diagnosed with bladder cancer. He had to have surgery, which got scheduled for the day before my birthday. My mother suggested that we celebrate my birthday earlier in the week, and the family was supposed to go out to eat with my aunts and one of my cousins. However, my dad had a test a few days before and was still in a lot of pain when it came time to go out to lunch. So my parents ended up staying home and I never actually got to celebrate turning 22 with them. On the actual day of my birthday, my brother and I went to visit my dad in the hospital. We were also supposed to go out for coffee and/or pastries with my aunt and grandmother, but ultimately we didn't get to. My mom did try to take us out for coffee, but it turned out she didn't have enough cash on her, so that kind of fell through, too. Anyway, on top of that, most of my friends were out of town and I only got a few lousy texts from two of my friends who were in town saying, "Happy birthday!" at about four p.m on my birthday.

Laura, mentioned before as being one of the wonderful friendship exceptions, did go out to eat with me. Plus she brought cupcakes. It meant so much to me.

Also, my dad is all good now. He has to go in every few months to make sure he's still cancer free, and he is! So yay! That's a side note, but I think it's an important side note because I told you he was diagnosed with cancer and even if that isn't really what this blogpost is about, it might be something that you're curious about.

The point is: last year, I wanted to have a Pushing Daisies themed party and instead I spent several days driving back and forth between our house and the hospital.

In May I graduated from college. After four years of hard work, I finally earned that degree. Pretty cool, right? I didn't go to the graduation ceremony, but I did use it as an opportunity to finally have that Pushing Daisies party. We had pies and decorated the house with daisies. A ton of my extended family came, and I love hanging out with my extended family. And I had a really nice time. Really, I did. It meant so much to me that they came... but: none of the friends that I invited showed up.

And I know that a lot of them have very valid excuses for that. And part of it is definitely my fault. I wanted to keep it small so I only invited a handful of people in the first place. But not one of them showed up. After the time that the invitation said the party was ending passed, most of my family members went for a walk. And I stayed at home because I felt like surely one of my friends will be coming. But none of them did.

So that's why I don't want to have a birthday this year. I wish I could just skip over the day. I don't know that I trust my friends to show up. And I'm really not okay with getting hurt about it all over again.

4th of July Weekend

So, I spent the bulk of this weekend home alone. On Thursday morning, my brother, mother, and father packed up the car and drove down to my grandmother's house. I was totally invited and part of me really wanted to go see my grandma, but I ultimately declined because I needed some time to myself. Basically, I just hung out with the pets, watched movies, and got a lot of work done. As many of you may know, I have a beauty and lifestyle youtube channel and blogspot blog and I did a lot of filming, editing, photographing, and otherwise preparing some of the stuff that will be coming up this month on my channel and blog. (Self promo side note: there's also a beautythekat tumblr that you could follow.)

But anyway. This is how I spent my weekend!

After my family left on Thursday, I went to Hyvee to get some groceries. Back at home, I applied for a couple of jobs and did a bit of work. Eventually, I decided to walk to deals to see if I could get some project materials. On my way to Deals, I ran into the tiniest girls in our neighborhood. They're like four or something. Anyway, one of them walked up to me, carrying a little plastic bag full of petals, feathers, rocks, and other trinkets they found around their yard. She looked at me and said in her very small voice, "We're selling these for free. Would you like some? We're selling them for free." I almost told them that wasn't a very smart business model, but stopped myself. Instead I said, "Well, they're very pretty. But I'm on my way to the store and wouldn't have any safe place to keep them. Good luck!" So the little girls went their way, and I went mine. I got to Deals only to find it had closed down, so instead I walked to Walmart. Both are close to my house, but their in opposite directions. So I wound up walking quite a bit.

When I got back to my house, I found the baggie of trinkets on my front step.

When I got home, I was exhausted. And people around the neighborhood had started celebrating 4th of July early so I had to deal with random bangs and frightened pets. That night, I made myself twice baked potatoes for dinner. I got the vague outline of a recipe from my friends Becca and Megan but even though it isn't mine, I'll probably still share it with you guys sometime down the road. They're delicious. The twice baked potatoes, I mean. They even peaked Zoey's interest. 

That evening, I did some laundry and worked on projects. Friday morning, I folded the laundry (all towels) I did the night before and started washing my clothes. Unfortunately, I didn't get all of the towels put away before Zoey decided they were her bed. (In my defense, I got the main bathroom towels and the kitchen towels put away before they got cat-hair infected. It was just the parents' bathroom towels that will need a second cleaning.)

Plus: How cute is she? SO CUTE, right?

I spent the rest of Friday morning working on a blogpost and video that will come out in two weeks. I've disguised it a bit so as to not completely ruin the surprise, but here's a sneak peek! 

Then, I reheated some twice baked potatoes for lunch. I worked on some video editing, photo editing, and blogging. I also got several fashion blog posts queued up! I also got changed. It's officially July and, in the midwest that means it's HOT HOT HOT outside. And the look for my upcoming blogpost and video required a lot of layers. I was sweating bullets! TMI? Oh well! 

Then, I headed over to Red Racks to see if I could acquire some articles of clothing that I will need for a video scheduled to come out in early August. I had a lot of success, accentuated by a HALF OFF EVERYTHING IN THE STORE sale! I was so excited! I got two shirts that I will need for the August video, one shirt that I'm modified into a vest for the August video, a pair of capris that my mom's going to help me modify into shorts for the August video, a just run of the mill cute shirt, and two books for gifts for friends all for under $10.00! 

I spent the rest of the evening on Friday working on a present for Renee (AKA the love of my life) and watching season 2 of The O.C. I'll give you a little peak at it. Since it's more in depth than just this page, I don't think it will spoil it!

 On Saturday, I spent most of the morning baking and working on projects. Awhile ago, I got really into baking homemade sweet breads (like pumpkin bread or banana bread) and my brother started joking that I should make a "pumpkin tower." Which is basically a layered dessert: pumpkin bread, brownies, and pumpkin bars with a layer of cream cheese frosting in between each. Every time he would add more random layers. Pumpkin pie. Chocolate cake. Pecan pie. Banana bread. It's completely absurd, you'd have to bake so many deserts in order to make just this one dessert. 

Well, here's the thing. I love giving people things. And making people things. "Gift giving" is definitely one of my love languages. And I particularly love getting to give people unprompted surprises. So I decided to make the pumpkin tower to surprise them when they got back. It was until I was actually compiling the thing that I realized: this is so much sugar in one desert. 

Needless to say, the pumpkin tower should be approached with caution. It's super sweet. You need a huge glass of water to get through a slice. Also, this morning, Nash asked, "Do you think that slice of pumpkin tower I ate yesterday had more than a thousand calories in it?" And here's the really scary thing: that's totally possible. If each layer had 350 calories? WHICH IS TOTALLY FEASIBLE. The slice he had yesterday would be 1050 calories. That's so scary. 

The bit I had transformed me into the squirrel from Hoodwinked. I totally smashed it playing family nertz afterward, though I admittedly was crashing near the end of the game. Nash reckons he would have won if we went to 300 instead of 200.

Saturday morning, while baking that horrific delicious dessert, I also uploaded a video! It's a "Character Look: Captain America" video. If you haven't seen it, you should check it ouuuuuut! (It's right here!)

Saturday I also got the book F*CK! I'm In My Twenties by Emma Koeing in the mail. I've enjoyed it so far. It's such an accurate representation of my twenties so far.

This morning, inspired by visiting Arkansan Hippies over that weekend, my mother was wearing a very Eureka Springs outfit. She looked super pretty!

Then, I hung out with my brother. We went to a coffee shop to work, but before hand... he took fashion blog photos for me! We got yelled out by our neighbor's one angry dog and then found a disgusting tick that was about to burst with blood... but eventually we got the pictures taken!

Also: sorry for showing you that picture of the tick. It's super gross, right? CRAZY GROSS. Its tiny, little legs were practically too small to stand. Nash moved it out by the bird feeder so hopefully a bird will eat it. 

Advice for the Undergrad

SO! It is officially my last week as an undergraduate. That's pretty cool, right? And it means that I have had four years of muddling my way through an undergraduate degree, which means I am full of amazing advice. And since I think I am so smart and charming, I've decided to give you that amazing advice, right here and right now.

1. Try really hard for the first couple of weeks. Go to class with the readings done. Participate in class discussion. Show up fifteen minutes early. That way you don't fall behind while trying to figure the class out. It's way better to realize the textbook doesn't matter after you're fifty pages into it than it is to realize the textbook does matter once you're fifty pages behind.
2. Bring things that make you comfortable as long as they don't make others uncomfortable. This is a bit of advice for if you're living in the dorms. So, go ahead and bring the dorky picture of you and your family on a ski trip and set your teddy bear on your desk. But, leave the slightly-pornographic posters and actual-stuffed-bear at home, okay? 
3. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Almost everyone, especially when they're around new people, is a little uncomfortable in their own skin. As a result, some people act angrier, more pessimistic, ditzier, more enthusiastic, or a number of other more-ers than they really are. I can't even begin to tell you how many angry, I'm-such-a-misfit, nobody-likes-me-and-I-like-it-that-way people I've met who are just playing up a giant don't-want-to-be-genuinely-rejected facade. Did you ever watch The O.C.? Do you remember that episode where Seth and Summer had really bad sex and then Summer had to go to him and say, "Look, the thing is, we were both virgins..." and it was, like, really shocking to him and the audience? Because she wore this I've-hooked-up-with-every-guy-in-Orange-County facade. Anyway, that's what life is like. Tons of people acting like something a little different than themselves because they don't want to get hurt. 
4. You don't actually owe anyone a chance, let alone two, or three, or four. Yes, sometimes it really behooves you to give them any number of chances. But you don't really owe it to them. I mean, yes, totally be open and kind towards new people. But, I went on three dates with this guy that I was never really interested in because someone said you don't really know if you like him until you give him a chance. And you know what? All of the dates were boring. And I kept going because I thought I "owed" him a chance. But I didn't. In fact, it was kind of just a waste of both of our time. I could've just said, "I'm not really interested, but you seem nice," and spent my Saturdays reading books, instead. I'm not saying, "don't give people chances." Totally give people chances. If you don't give people chances, you'll miss out. But, also, use your judgement. 
5. Don't hang out with people who make you feel bad about yourself. I ranted about this in a video, so I'll just link it here. 
6. Eat breakfast. Tons of people are like, "I don't really eat breakfast..." but there's a reason they say it's the most important meal of the day. And that reason is: you probably haven't eaten in like eight hours. So eat something! Let's say you sleep in. What do you do? You buy a box of Poptarts so you can eat something while running to class. Don't be immature. Skipping breakfast or just having coffee for breakfast doesn't make you edgy, cool, or mature. It makes you hungry and unfocused. "Oh, not me!" You cry out. Bitch, don't lie. You fall asleep in class like all the time 'cause you don't eat breakfast. "I do not! I drink coffee." Great, you pump your body full of uppers with nothing to nourish you. Yeah, that's good for your physical and mental health. I'm being sarcastic. Eat some food, you damn fool.
7. Read your books and go to class. Now, if you were to pay full price for tuition at my school, and you were to take twelve credit hours, each credit hour would be $2,062. If you were to take eighteen credit hours, each would cost $1,375. At my school, your average class period costs $412.50. So, I know you think it's super cool that you slept through Chem or didn't read any of your Women & Lit books and still passed with an "A" or a "B" or whatever. But, in reality, it's stupid. Because, if you're in a school like mine, you're spending $412.50 per class period to apparently not learn anything. School isn't just about getting grades. It's about learning stuff. That's why you're spending that money. So, great. You got an "A" on your paper about The Epic of Gilgamesh and you only read the sparknotes. Fabulous. You wasted your money and your time. And you now you probably don't know shit about the Epic of Gilgamesh. Which is a pretty freaking cool epic, too.
8. That having been said... Everything is going to be all right. If you're like me, you'll be totally freaking out going in to class when you don't have the reading for the day finished. Or, you'll be two seconds away from an emotional collapse if you have to walk into class ten minutes late. But you know what? It'll be okay. It's not the end of the world if you bomb a test or have to turn an assignment in late. Be responsible for your actions, don't makeup excuses, and talk to your professor as soon as humanly possible. But don't make yourself sick over it. A small mistake here or there won't cost you your GPA, your future, your scholarship, or whatever. So long as that small mistake is, like, missing a pop quiz and not, like, manslaughter. 
9. Be nice to people. Don't call people names, don't dismiss people's feelings, don't gossip about people behind their backs. Don't call someone a "freak" to their face or a "whore" to their back. Here's a secret: people like nice people. Trash-talking jerks? Not so much. 
10. Sleep at night. Sleep at night, limit your alcohol/tobacco/coffee consumption, walk whenever you get the chance. All that shit is good for reducing your anxieties. 
11. Be polite at dinner parties. That means: be willing to try new things. Thank your host for everything, even the things you didn't like. If you can't eat something... Let's say you're a vegetarian or you 110% hate eggplant or you're allergic cheese... try and let the host know before hand. If you're not able to do so, say, "Thank you very much for offering, but I'm going to have to pass. Still, I really appreciate you making this for me." If you try something new, and you don't like it, don't make a show about not liking it. 
12. Try new things. Show up at open mic nights, take dance classes, and join your friends for a knitting circle. Whenever you can, take classes that interest you but aren't required of you. College, and life, is about widening your horizons. So do it.
13. Apologize when you've hurt someone's feelings. If you notice someone getting quiet and sad, stop what you're doing immediately. Ask they're all right. If you've done something to hurt their feelings, even if you didn't mean to, apologize. And just apologize. Don't justify your actions. Saying, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was offending you!" is okay. Saying, "I'm sorry! I was just joking! It was just a joke! Joke-joke-jokity-joke!" is not.
14. Leave bad situations. If you're feeling uncomfortable, if people are hurting your feelings, if everyone at that party has gotten a little too drunk, if someone's asking you to do something you aren't comfortable with, or if someone's lit up a joint? Feel free to leave. Seriously, I encourage you to leave. 
15. Pull your weight in group projects. Don't be that person who shows up two-hours late when the presentation is already pretty much put together and then sits around complaining about how they have this project and a speech and a test and a paper all due this week. College is rough on everybody. Lots of people are taking tons of credit hours. Lots of people are working off campus. Lots of people are working on campus. Lots of people are really involved in clubs. Sometimes you will have to listen to an audiobook of Frankenstein while putting together a "fairytales-and-fable land" board game for the English Club. Sometimes, you will have to work on a paper while visiting with your grandparents. It's hard to balance everything sometimes. But don't use all of that to excuse not doing work in a group project. Because, most likely, everyone is trying to balance a ton of things. And those people, the ones who are also trying to balance a ton of things, are having to take on more work because you're slacking off. 

Okay, so... as an experienced college student, that's my advice for you. Oh, and, if you're in multiple lit classes, seriously consider getting audiobook versions of some of your books. That way, you can "read" while getting ready in the morning, driving, walking, grocery shopping, and idly staring at attractive men in coffee shops. 

My most important piece of advice, though, is to remember that everything will be okay. Seriously. It will. 

In the Last Four Years

So, I am officially less than a month away from graduating college with a bachelors degree in English and blah blah blah you don't care. Okay, so, let's talk some about the college experience. Actually, that sounds boring, too, so... I'm going to mostly just give you pictures and short descriptions of memories. But before I do that, I'll intro it a little better than this.

So, there were a lot of shitty things about my college experience. I had relationships with people who made me feel small and stupid and worthless. I spent a year in a foggy haze of sadness, battling weeks of depression and waiting for the three-days-of-relief in between. Some of my friends went through some really horrible stuff. But that's life, right? Really terrible things happen. People you care about really hurt you. Sometimes you really have to force yourself to get out of bed. So, the point is, there's some shit you have to deal with. But there are also some really spectacular times, moments, and things. (Ugh, so vague, my advisor would be so mad at me if she read this.) The point is, there are a lot of good things about life. There have been a lot of good things about my college experience. And sometimes when I start to think thank goodness this is almost done it has been hell I have to remind myself that there have also been a lot of good times. And, honestly, I'm very thankful for the majority of my college experiences.

Okay, boring introduction finished. Now, here are some things I enjoyed about college:

Jacob drew a picture of me as a magician
to make amends for the fact that I was
NEVER a magician in his dreams.

• My freshman year of college, Nash was going to the same school as me. Especially during the second semester, almost every night Nash, Renee, Jacob and I would go to Starbucks to do homework. Renee would, for chunks of time, abandon our table because we were distracting. Nash and Jacob one time wrote a bunch of scripts for a webseries based on our conversations. I just remember that, in one, Nash impaled himself with a pen and in another I gave Renee my purity ring so that I could go do not-so-pure things. Anyway, those were good times.

Nash being proud that the barista drew a cat on his coffee cup.

I was looking for pictures from the excursion or whatever
but I think must have lost them. So, this is from when I visited
her this past February.

• My sophomore year of college, Nash had left school. And for various other reasons, there were a lot less instances of group study trips to Starbucks. But, my lovely friend, Dani, and I would go get ice cream late at night a lot. Also, one time we went on this excursion of sorts, where we made up different identities for each other and went around pretending to be different people. 

• My freshman year, I took this Theater Appreciation class with Nash and Renee. (Side story about the first day of class: earlier in the day I had Women and Lit. One of the kids in my class called our professor "Ms." and she went on a little rant about being called either "Dr." or "Professor." I saw her again as Nash, Renee, and I were leaving Theater Appreciation. Immediately, Renee goes, "AMY!" and runs up to talk to her. It was... sitcom timing. She wasn't mad, though. It's impossible to be mad at Renee. Renee is the kindest/sweetest person alive.) Anyway, basically everything about Theater Appreciation was fun because Nash and Renee were there. We did group projects together! We watched The Man Who Came to Dinner. We were of the only five people who would do the improv games as anything other than "intoxicated" characters.

  

  Renee as one of the fairies from Midsummer Night's Dream.

• During spring break of my... when was it? Freshman? Sophomore? I think sophomore... year of college, my mom and I went to Columbia and stayed with my uncle, then we went to Springfield and stayed with my aunt. While we were in Columbia we got to see Matt Nathanson in concert. Also, mom braided my hair and we went to a pet store to hold bunnies. 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Twice, I've taken mini-road trips to visit my best friend, Alli. The first time, shortly after I arrived we went to a rap concert. Which is a little weird, I have to admit. Also, I was so exhausted from driving, and it was pretty late at night, that despite the fact that it was super loud, I fell asleep. Then we went to eat pancakes. The second time, I stayed for a couple nights. We went to a fall festival at her school. She had to leave at one point to do sorority stuff, so her roommates and I went to get pizza. Anyway, good times. She's the best. 
• ALSO, this past February I went to visit my aunt. I wrote a blogpost about that, so, you might remember it. One thing that was nice about that, was it snowed and then I got to skip all of my Monday classes.
• Once, sophomore year, Renee asked me if I'd be free on Saturday to go on a picnic. Then, I guess she forgot that she asked, 'cause Thursday and Friday she was all giggly, like, "I HAVE A SURPRISE PLANNED FOR TOMORROW!!!" The surprise was a picnic. Renee's a goof. I love her so much.
• I won the playwright award for our school's literary magazine two years in a row. I also won Mock Trial Student of the Year, once. Also, I won some super secret excellence in English award. I also was president of the English, and then Spanish-English club, two years in a row. ...That bit wasn't really "fond memories." It was mostly just bragging. 
• I went to the Kansas City Slut Walk. Nobody went with me, and it was after a shitty week of depression, and some of the friends that I invited and didn't go with me, went to the gym instead, and that really irked me. Also, it was kind of rainy and humid that day. But, now that it's a bit later, I can just think fondly of the fact that I went, you know? 
  
• Nash invented "coffee house games" and throughout the past few years, we occasionally have coffee house game nights. So, a handful of people will get together and we'll all lay different writing games. We've gone to coffee houses, cafes, and just thrown parties in people's livingrooms. It's so much fun. You can read some of the products of these games here.
• Usually, I hang out with the church folk more often during the summers. Which is fun. I like helping out at, like, VBS. One summer, I did an internship for Coldwater, which is the nonprofit run out of my church. Also, we sometimes go on a cool retreats.v

  

  A whole slew of us lovely church ladies rockin' the same hairstyle.

• Speaking of church retreats... My freshman year of college, I went with the youth on a retreat. And I had so much fun. I felt comfortable refusing to participate in any ridiculous scaling-building or falling-off-poles exercises. I wrote "Kat is Pretty" on basically everyone's forearm. And... I'm actually not quite sure what else happened that weekend. I mean, I have a lot of memories, but we went there so many times that I'm having difficulty differentiating trips. 
  

• My Freshman year, I started a youtube channel. And I have had so much fun youtubing.  

This is my first ever youtube video. So. Yeah. Enjoy or whatever.

• Remember how I said that I saw Matt Nathanson perform in concert? Well, that was super exciting because he's one of my favorite musicians. And I've also had the pleasure of seeing Frightened Rabbit and Mountain Goats in concert, which is cool, because they are two of my favorite bands! Plus, Nash. Nash is one of my favorite musicians (not just because he's my brother, either) but I'm basically always hearing him perform live. 
• Related: two or three times we've hosted house concerts. I always really enjoy those. Once, I made vegan brownies. Which didn't taste like brownies. They just tasted odd. 
• Also, I hosted a release party for Nash's second album. (I say "I hosted" because I fixed all the food and it was on our back deck, but, I suppose technically Nash brought and set up the sound equipment. Plus he's the one who released the album.) It was great, we had loads of friends and family come out. 
• This past year, I also had the pleasure of meeting two of my favorite authors, John Green and Rainbow Rowell. I wrote a blogpost about that, too. Can I just say: Rainbow Rowell is crazy beautiful, you guys. We were standing in line, waiting for her to show up, and when we saw her walking up, my mind totally blanked on everything other than she is so pretty, she is so, so pretty. Also, when I met John Green I was pretty incapable of saying anything because I just kept thinking this is weird, he really exists.

  

  Me and RAINBOW FREAKING ROWELL

  

  Here it looks like I'm talking to John Green, but in reality he's saying,
  "Thanks for coming out" and I'm just staring at him.

• Renee and I went on a quest during my junior year of college. We went to coffee shops and walked around the city and scoured an antiques shop to find letters. I think we went to three coffee shops in total. IN ONE OUTING. That's ridiculous. But I love it. 
• Once, my sophomore year, Renee and I talked about how neither of us had been on a "real" date before. So, we decided we would go on a date together. We dressed up, got coffee, lunch, and ice cream. It was so much fun. 
• My freshman year, Alli came and stayed with me one weekend. The next morning, Nash, Renee, Jacob, Alli, and I went to one of my favorite breakfast places in the Metro, Simply Breakfast. We had a good time while we were there, and then we all wrote notes and drew pictures for the waitress. We left them with the tip. 

• During my sophomore year of college, I learned how to make sock bunnies. When spring came, I threw a Spring Tea Party. I invited my guests by putting invitations in hollowed out and painted egg shells (where they would have to crack them in order to get the invitation) in little origami boxes. Everyone who came got a sock bunny as a party favor. (Then, everyone stuffed them in their shirts and we called it a "boobs and bunnies" party.)
  
  
  
• Speaking of parties, I actually threw a handful of tea parties during my first two years at school. My freshman year, on Halloween, my friend, Charlotte, and I threw a zombie tea party, which was fun. The next year, I just threw a run-of-the-mill tea party for Halloween.

Nikki and I at the Zombie Tea Party

These losers didn't wear costumes. 

• One time, my brother and I participated in Search Out Hunger. It was a scavenger hunt that rose money and awareness(?) for a Back Snack program that sends weekend meals home with kids on free and reduced lunch programs. (I'm not actually 100% sure if my info is right here. It might have, instead, been to help fund a food pantry which provides people in need with free groceries a few times in the month.) Anyway, we were supposed to dress like heroes, so Nash and I went as Oscar Wilde and Charlotte Bronte. So, we took some artistic liberties with that assignment. 
• This past Halloween, I had a lot of work to do for my senior thesis. But, I took a brief break from it to go with Nash to our friend Liz's party. He went as hipster!Link and I went as Robin. We played jenga and watched people play... beer pong? I think. Then, we had to leave early, and I had to stay up until about 1:00 in the morning working on my thesis. But, it was fun. So, it was worth it.
• In July of 2012, I threw a Princess Party! It wasn't for my birthday, but also it kind of was. Everyone (but Nash) came dressed as some form of royalty. All of our refreshments were related to one royal or another (mostly Disney princesses, if I remember correctly). It was fun. Really fun. 

• That year, the day after my birthday, I celebrated National Lumberjack Day with some of my friends. We wore flannel shirts and ate pancakes. My friend, Ben, gave Alli and I fishtail braids. 
• Shortly after National Lumberjack Day, I went with a group of friends to see Step Up... 3? 4? Whichever one came out that year. It was good. I like the Step Up movies.
• Last semester, the Spanish English Club hosted an open mic night. I recited some poetry, Nash played some music, and one of my friends (Alden) dynamically read the first few pages of Hugh Laurie's novel. In the end, we all did improv until crazy-late. It was a lot of fun.

Nash and Jacob performing "Finger Stains"
(like the jackasses that they are)

Alden... has issues with gravity? I can't really remember
why he was ballet dancing. I think it had something to do
with clouds, though.

• Last year, at the Sound and Fury release party, each of the "winners" were supposed to read their submission out loud. When it was my turn, they offered, "I guess you could read one of your poems instead..." but there were only two main characters in my play, so... Nash read the male part, Renee read the female part, and I read all the other characters and the stage directions. I had forgotten, but there were, like, seven other small roles, so I had to employ several different voices. 
• When Renee was getting close to graduating, I started hanging out with her all the time. One time, a bunch of her friends went to her apartment to hang out while she was packing. They were all so cool. I can't even describe it, really. We weren't doing much. Just calling dibs on the sweatpants and t-shirts she was having to leave behind. But it was one of my favorite days. 
• I worked as a cashier with this guy, Barry, and he was the coolest old guy. He would asked me if I had a boyfriend, and accused me of lying when I said I didn't. After that, he asked what I thought about almost every young man who I sold books to. Also, he asked what I thought about several of the guys we worked with. (The first time we worked with one guy, he was training, and when he went to break, Barry goes, "What do you think of him?" And I was like, "He seems smart, he'll get the ha--" and he interrupts, "Boyfriend material?") He's hilarious. 
• My sophomore year, I went to a Scott Pilgrim vs. The World screening with my friend, Liz. She went as Kim Pine and I went as Roxie Richter.

There are so many other things I could include. I have about 10,000 wonderful things that I could say about my classes this semester alone. My freshman year, I had a writing class with a really eccentric teacher who, as a metaphor for "thinking outside of the box" drew a line on the wall above the dry erase board. Then, he fell back with an expression of shock and panic. It was hilarious. I have tons of good memories with my dog, Jubilee, from these past few years. I discovered the pleasure of going to movies alone. My mom and I went to see Veronica Mars. I'm not positive but... I think Alli, her mom, and I went to see Little House on the Prairie: The Musical within the past four years... no, actually, that was probably when I was in high school... but that was a hysterically bizarre production. My freshman year, there was a group of about five of us who ate breakfast together almost every day. Nash, Nikki, and I went to a murder mystery party. I wrote two novels. Shitty novels, but, still. 

So, there are a tons of other things that I could include. But, let's be honest, this has already been a crazy long blogpost. But then, it has been like four years. That's a lot of time, yo. The point is... there are good things in there. I know so many fabulous people now. I had so much fun. I dressed up on so many non-Halloween days. Yeah, I had a ton of work to do. I had some difficult times. But, man, there were so many spectacular moments. 

"thinking outside the box"

Elevator Introductions//Business Card Brainstorming

Okay, as I am about to reach the "scrambling for a job" stage of my life, I've been brainstorming "Elevator Introductions"--which are quick descriptions of self that you can give someone during an elevator ride, if necessary, in order to help you network and potentially get hired. Anyway, here's some that I've come up with, let me know what you think! For our purposes, today, I'll put them in the potential business card version.

• Katrina High: Like a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death -- Proverbs 26:18
• Katrina High: In the words of Disney's Frozen: Her quote "engagement" is a flex arrangement and, by the way, I don't see no ring
• Katrina High: Not everything she says is a lie. 
• Katrina High: Has at least 7 friends. Is literate.
• Katrina High: Can braid hair. Cannot do french braids, fishtail braids, or any other fancy, elaborate braid styles.
• Katrina High: Cold. Sleepy. Sad. 
• Katrina High: Learns fast. Forgets faster. 
• Katrina High: Does lots of things kind of well. 
• Katrina High: Eats food before checking to see if it forms divine images. 
• Katrina High: Almost always wears shirts. Almost never wears pants. 
• Katrina High: Usually sleeps at nights. 
• Katrina High: Has been alive for at least half of her life!
• Katrina High: This isn't her real number. #########*
• Katrina High: Sometimes she thinks before telling a joke. But then again, sometimes she doesn't. 
• Katrina High: Patronizes people so well, that sometimes they don't realize they're being patronized. But then, sometimes they do. She's also pretty good at apologizing.
• Katrina High: Seduces men. Practices witchcraft.
• Katrina High: Probably hasn't ever stolen anything from you.
• Katrina High: At least she isn't Rush Limbaugh, you know what I mean?
• Katrina High: Adds vanilla extract and cinnamon to her French Toast Recipe. 
• Katrina High: Can't remember what real hamburgers taste like. 
• Katrina High: One time she got hit by a car.
• Katrina High: Just like Leslie Knope but without the optimism or the work ethic.
• Katrina High: Wears those jeans well.
• Katrina High: Has at least two good stories.

Uh, yeah, so that's what I've come up with so far. Let me know what you think. Also, comment down below with your business card/elevator introduction ideas... 'cause I want you to.

*The joke** here is that, if you count, there are only nine number signs. 

**Yes, these are jokes. You don't have to advise me against calling myself a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death*** on business cards or saying that I "do a lot of things kind of well" in an elevator introduction.

***In case you didn't get this one, there are actually two levels to the "like a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death" joke. See, Proverbs 26:18-19 says, " Like a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death is one who deceives their neighbor and says, 'I was only joking!'" So, the first level of the joke is the surface: calling yourself "a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death" to potential employees isn't wise. But then the other level of the joke is that I'm actually calling myself deceitful, which is true. As referenced in my third business card suggestion, I lie a lot. 

Room Cleaning

So, for... a really long time... I've been in the process of cleaning my room. During the semester, I get super busy with class, commuting, work study, and homework. Then, during my breaks, I often get in a do-absolutely-nothing slump. So, my room gets... well, disgusting to be frank. So what's been happening is that, during the weekends, in between homework, video-making, blogging, and, let's be honest, napping/watching cop shows featuring handsome men, I tidy up bits of my room. But I never get it CLEAN clean, and then throughout the school week, it gets TORN UP again. It's madness.

Now, I've also been dealing with a lot of anxiety as of late. So, I sat down and thought about what steps I could take to improve my emotional health. One thing that occurred to me is that, when my room is a mess, I don't feel comfortable there. So, I don't really have any sort of refuge.

SO: this weekend, I was determined to do a deep/spring clean. I tweeted about it a couple times and then, finally, tweeted out that I had finished cleaning my room. Renee promptly replied my favorite sort of reply ever: PICS OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

So, Renee, this is for you.

Cleaning my room, I found lots of cool stuff. Like, this blinging costume jewelry. Also, I found this page of a notebook where I've written, "Things that make me happy" and then... didn't add anything to that list.

I started cleaning my room on Friday early evening. By about 11:00, I'd created a proper mess... as can happen in the process of cleaning. You know, as you empty out drawers and rearrange the closet. Anyway, I reached the "super exhausted" stage of cleaning just as I reached the "small mess is officially a massive mess" stage of cleaning. So, my bed looked like this:

So, that was frustrating. And most of that just ended up back on the floor in order for me to sleep immediately. 

Saturday morning, I got up early to get back to cleaning. But at 11:30 A.M. I had plans with a friend, so when I got back at around 5:00, there was still a lot that I needed to do in my room. Cleaning my room, and covering my bed in crap, inspired a lot of curiosity in my cat. So, here's a cute picture of her sniffing my boots:

Anyway, we should get to the pictures of actually finishing my room cleaning, as that's the bit that Renee questioned my success of... So, just.... look, okay? It looks really nice and I'm excited about it.

Ah, lovely, right? Right. Beautiful. Wonderful. Clean. Hahaha. Told you, Renee. 

"This was a pointless blog post," You say.

I place my face in my palms and sob, "DON'T TELL ME HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE."